Chewymom

DS12 was in first grade, and I was at a parent-teacher conference. It had been a hard year for him. He had attended a preschool in Atlanta and then switched to the Christian school where his brother, DS15 was a student for Kindergarten. After that year we made the decision to move to the public school system, so once again we changed schools at the start of DS12’s first grade year. Things were going well until DH lost his job. After a few months of unemployment for DH and free school lunches for DS12, DH got a job in north Alabama, and we moved over Christmas. DS12 started his fourth school in 1-1/2 years in January of first grade.

Surprisingly, he made the transition to his new school very well. His teacher, in fact, wanted to talk to me about a character trait she was seeing in DS12. She began to notice that although DS12 was a very athletic, active kid, if anybody was down in the dumps or hurting during recess, he would stop what he was doing and go and sit down beside the student. Sometimes he would talk to the kid, sometimes just sit in silence alongside him. As a six-year-old he was showing a surprising amount of compassion.

Fast forward to the summer before third grade, and DS12 made another school change when we moved to another small town in Alabama. In spite of an intense desire to fit in with kids who had been in school together since preschool and whose mothers had been in school since about the same age, DS12 never changed his character. There was a boy from our church who had autism. His parents decided to switch over from the self-contained classroom at one elementary school to the district school, and that would place their son in a regular third grade class. They called me to see if I would mind if they requested that their son be placed in the class with DS12. They had already noticed how comfortable DS12 was with their son, and it gave them comfort as they made this frightening transition.

This student did end up in DS12’s class, and true to his character, DS12 befriended him. At recess he would run and play and get right in the mess of the boy-sports that were going on, but he would also be keenly aware of his friend. He went out of his way to sit with his friend whenever possible and to treat him just like he would want to be treated. He set a tone for his class on how to relate to this boy that carries through to this day. When it was time for a birthday, this student was invited right along with everyone else.

DS12 is now in 7th grade, and even last summer, he would think to initiate a phone call to his friend with autism to invite him over to swim or play on the Wii. His character still proves him to be one who is kind to all and who has his eye out for the downtrodden. Some might say that this is just the way he is, regardless of who is in his family, but I happen to think it is also something he has learned by having a brother with special needs.

This entry was posted on Saturday, October 20th, 2007 at 8:20 am and is filed under Down syndrome, Mommy Musings. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.