Get it Down Day 15–Communication
DS16, DD5 and I spent the weekend in Indiana with a big group of online friends from a T-21 community. I can’t even begin to describe how awesome it was, but I’m sure it will come through in several of my upcoming blog posts.
I learned some interesting things about DS16 this weekend. He had a great time making the rounds among the adults, particularly the men. He has always been that way. Over and over I would catch a piece of his conversation with an adult and overhear him saying, “Well, you KNOW I’m famous….” Delusions of grandeur.
The other group DS16 gravitated toward were the under 7 crowd. He kept them entertained with his silliness and antics. A specialty for him–being the oldest of five kids, he has had lots of experience entertaining young ‘uns.
DS16 had the opportunity to meet a 19-year-old young man with Down syndrome, and a really cute 14-year-old girl also with Down syndrome. In both instances, they did not communicate with one another.
I have been pondering this lack of communication between these teens with T-21, and I have a theory. DS16 does great with kids his own age in his school because they reciprocate in conversation. If he tells about his weekend, they’ll say, “Oh, that’s cool!” And they might tell their own story or ask a question to keep the conversation going. But that is a conversation skill that is missing for DS16, and maybe for these others as well. He can tell about himself and what he is doing, but that thinking of others and understanding the social skill of asking about their lives is not there.
I asked DS16’s special education teacher about that this morning. Most of the time when DS16 is around other kids with special needs, there is an adult or a typical peer-tutor present as well. So if the conversation stalls out, the typical person is there to pick it up again.
I am really thankful for the opportunity to observe this communication gap this weekend. Because as much as I value DS16’s ability to be a social person (and he is QUITE social) in a normal society, it is also important that he be able to communicate effectively with those with special needs. One day (sadly, very soon), his typical peers will begin to graduate and leave home. DS16, I suspect, will begin to involve himself more and more with other young adults with special needs. One day, I want the option of romance and marriage to be there for him. In order to have a satisfying social life, he needs to know how to relate to and carry a conversation with others who are similar to him developmentally. Like that cute girl he met this weekend! 
October 15th, 2007 at 6:44 pm
Aw very interesting. A local gal here who is super smart, just got a job at an Early Intervention provider. Her Mom told me the director asked if they could give Megan some free ST to teach her just those skills you are talking about. Makes so much sense! I loved seeing you guys! Tell my famous friend that I miss him already!