Chewymom

President Obama,

It must be challenging to appear on a humor-based television show. You seem to do well in those situations, but there is always the chance of saying something stupid that you will regret later. Like this:

Mr. President, you yourself are a minority. You have heard remarks that marginalized you and other black people for most of your life. Of all people, you should know how that was going to go over.

Badly.

Here are the thoughts of some of my Facebook friends who have children with disabilities.

• S is having to an advocate once again for my daughter and others with physical and mental disabilities! Shame on you, Obama!
• I can’t believe he really said that…maybe it’s time to stop trying to be a superstar celeb and getcher butt back to the White House!
• When I heard that he said that, my heart sank. My son is 21, has special needs, was in the Special Olympics and now volunteers for the Special Olympics, and he proudly voted for Obama. I think Obama is a wonderful person and will be a great president, but he said something stupid and needs to apologize. I’m sure if he had a child with special needs he would be more sensitive to this issue, but that’s not an excuse. He needs to apologize and learn from this mistake.
• President Obama perpetuated a stereotype that Special Olympians are not real athletes or are lesser athletes. In the meantime, there is a Special Olympian here in the Detroit area who has bowled at least three perfect games.
• Disability slurs are so acceptable it didn’t even hit the radar of anyone except parents like us. And if we speak out about we will be told we are being too sensitive, too PC, he really didn’t mean it that way. Which…. I bet he didn’t. That’s the really dangerous part…. it’s so acceptable and people with disabilites are so marginalized, even slurs about them don’t mean anything.
• I can’t believe Obama just said that. He may be a financial advocate for our kids, but he has to learn now that it is MUCH MIUCH more than that! Damn it. WHY is it still okay to publicly demoralize our kids? Here’s the thing, I used to do it too, but then you learn the hurt it inflicts and you stop saying it you know? So waiting for the apology from HIM, not his office.

That’s just a sampling.

While we are on the topic of Special Olympics, let me tell you about my son who is a Special Olympics athlete. This would be the son, by the way, who turned 18 just days before the election and made sure he registered to vote so he could cast his vote for YOU! He recently swam in a local meet and came in under two minutes on the 100 IM. Now, that’s a time that most “regular” athletes could beat, but most regular people who are not on a swim team might not. Many cannot even swim the butterfly stroke. The effort he has put into training and competing is more than many other high school seniors who are not involved in any sport at all. He works hard, he stays in shape, and he deserves to be respected for doing his personal best and for getting out there and working toward an athletic goal. Your comments show a lack of respect for him and others with disabilities.

The thing is, Mr. President, many, many of us within the disability community supported you in your run for office. We believe you to be an advocate for our children. And I truly think you said this without thinking.

I’m going to let you in on a little secret. I hate the “R” word. I cringe when I hear it. Depending on the situation, sometimes I correct and educate the person gently, and sometimes I let it go. But truthfully, the “R” word enters my head…STILL! My son is 18, and I can’t tell you how many times I think the “R” word, but I somehow block it from escaping my lips.

Which is surprising considering how many things DO escape my lips.

But which is something I hope you will practice doing as well - not just with that word, but with any kind of slur which might be hurtful to a minority group.

Whether this was a stupid mistake - one of those foot-in-the-mouth moments that you just wish had never happened, or something you read from a teleprompter, or something you thought was funny at the time but hopefully now realize how hurtful it actually was, I would like to hear you apologize. Not your staff, not the media putting a spin on it, not someone saying, “He regrets it, but…” with a host of excuses. Just you. Saying you are sorry. The same kind of apology you would want if someone uttered a racial slur in front of you.

Thank you.

This entry was posted on Friday, March 20th, 2009 at 8:58 am and is filed under Down syndrome, Dreaded Politics. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.