This Ain’t Your Mama’s OCD
I am trying to figure out why God has brought about a gazillion people into my life in the past few years who have children with OCD. I suppose a small part of it might be the fact that once you have a child with a disability–any kind of disability–you begin to meet more and more people who are walking a similar path. But several of these are friends I already had who down the road learned that their child has OCD. And it makes me wonder if the numbers are on the rise, just as they are with autism.
Growing up, did you know anyone with OCD? Oh, I mean we all had friends that we said had OCD. People like my mom, who could not go to bed unless the dishwasher was emptied and every dish put away, or who reminded me about five times each day to get my school books OFF of her counter already. Or like my friend who keeps a spotless house and has to rearrange the sofa cushions whenever anyone gets up off of the sofa. You know, the “ha-ha” kind of OCD. Yeah, these people are a little compulsive, but their life is not adversely affected by it.
That’s not what I’m talking about. These friends of mine have children who wash their hands until the skin is peeling off, and then they try to force their siblings to follow the same behavior patterns. They fear thunderstorms and sharks to the point that they are debilitated and cannot go to sleep. They rage when they cannot force others to comply with their obsession. These are children whose brains are literally wired differently. They do not have the filters that allow them to STOP the obsessive thoughts like most of us do. Their obsessions disrupt the entire family, and the mom has to spend hours each day working with the one child.
Interestingly in a few of these families, one of the parents had the “other” kind of OCD. One of them cleans out his wife’s car before he enters the house when he gets home from work each day. Another one keeps the house completely clean, and yet another worries about her children even more than most moms.
So what is the difference? Why is it that my generation of people with OCD, while maybe a bit quirky, were not debilitated? And yet their children are? I don’t have the answers. I have no doubt there are as many theories about this as there are about autism or early puberty or whatever other generational changes we are seeing. Too much tv? Hormones in milk? Genetics? More lenient parenting styles? Chemicals in foods and in the environment?
Do any of you readers have thoughts about this? Have you observed the same phenomenon?
July 20th, 2008 at 6:35 pm
When I was a teen (25 years ago!) I knew a kid who washed his hands until they were purple. He went to a psychiatric hospital for several months. So, I think there WERE kids like this a generation ago. But we didn’t have the internet, cable/satellite tv, and all that other media publicizing it.
July 21st, 2008 at 1:33 pm
I’d also have to say, we hid disabilities, disabilities were shameful. So I’m guessing there were people who had OCD or other issues and knew how to keep it under wraps in public.
Just a thought…
July 26th, 2008 at 9:28 pm
I have been reading (for WAY too long) “Healing the new Childhood Epidemics” ..I bet you would really find it interesting. It’s all mind boggling, I tend to think it’s the environment and food.
July 27th, 2008 at 9:31 am
If you have OCD to some degree it makes sense that your friends would as well, since we seem attracted to others with similar “differences from the typical”.
There is a genetic tendency with OCD, so then your friends with OCD would have children with OCD.
If the OCD doesn’t interfere with one’s life, then it’s a quirk and not a disorder.
July 30th, 2008 at 4:34 pm
Karen,
Not to make light of anyone’s struggle with OCD, I thought I’d share a cute comment. My daughter (who is more in the “haha” OCD realm) recently found a “sticker” for her Facebook page that says “I have CDO–it’s like OCD but the letters are arranged alphabetically because I like it that way”.